When I first started my career as a high school biology teacher, I was talking with my mom about how the teacher education program I went through for my credential did not teach me much about dealing with teenagers. I felt out of place in the classroom. Mom told me to view each student as if I were their father. Treat them the same way I would treat my son and I would hope my son's teachers would treat him.
That was doable. It took several years to put into practice but I consistently improved over the years and as my son grew up. My parents divorced back in 1968. My father was beating her and us kids and she said no more. I grew up without a male role model and never felt I fit in with my male peers. A very wise person told me soon after my son was born that I had plenty of role models for knowing what not to do so I only had to be the dad I wanted when growing up. I would make mistakes but as long as I learned from them and improved, all would be good. He turned out to be right.
Over the past several years I have had some troubled students make great strides in improving because I take the time to talk to them like a father should when addressing their poor behavior and my knowledge that they can do much better and I expect that from them.
Last week, on the last day of school, I was told by more students than ever that they were glad I was their teacher because I helped them, was patient, and encouraged them to always do better and learn from their mistakes. Some even tell me that they wish I could be their dad because they do not have a dad in their lives.
The sad part is, each year the number of students that tell me how much I helped them increases because even more than ever before do not have a dad in their life.
Things are getting worse for all the reasons you mentioned.
The whole "me, too" thing scared the crap out of me. Just an accusation of sexual talk is enough to get a guy fired. Find out what happens when a bi-polar female coworker gets mad at you for any reason, then imagine if she was a student? People even went after Fred Rogers! You're a brave man, doing a good thing in a world that loves to believe the worst.
For a while there, you described my childhood in a 2-parent, Christian household (my papa was a Methodist minister who could preach hell-fire when he deemed it a necessity in the community), a young marriage, 3 precious sons, and a divorce--papa said I had been unevenly yoked--that led to single parenting and dipping a toe in the 1960s dating pool. Now I watch my remaining precious son and his wife, and their two daughters and son in their 20s and 30s, as they navigate today's society. And all I can do is express the love I have for them, guide them from my matriarchal seat if they ask, and treasure them for the people they are, men and women coping in this largely divided world they've inherited. And, of course, this issue of Culturcidal will be shared to the social sites where I have an account, hoping to get your analysis out there. Thank you, John, for putting it together.
I was born in America, had two parents who never got divorced and two grandparents I visited often. It feels like that puts me ahead of 95% of the planet these days.
Jordan Peterson and Joe Rogan are influencers helping on this front. I read that more young men are attending church... benefitting from the lessons of scripture but also benefitting from the congregation connections.
"The study found that among men under 30 years old, over 60 percent are single, almost double that of women in the same age bracket."
I always find this published study unbelievable as it derives the clear question who are those chicks dating if 60% males are single? Are the chicks more apt to be lesbians? Are they all dating the same small population of dudes? Are they claiming they are not single just having hooking up now and then, but the boys are defining single as not having a steady relationship?
Males are somewhat responsible for their own defeat here. They enable female vulnerable narcissism and female aggression against them because of their uncontrolled male libido. Males are terrified of females for the simple reason that males fear being denied sex. It is an irrational behavior that likely derives from evolutionary biology. And aside from this, and possibly related to this, is standard male chivalry toward women... even the women that don't deserve it.
I use the following to demonstrate the male flaw.
If females and males are truly equal as is demanded by the feminist left that controls the Democrat party, then if being called a racist, misogynist, Nazi... pushed and spit upon at a protest... why would you not punch that female in the face?
The thought makes you recoil in disgust, doesn't it?
That recoil is evidence of the male flaw and the female leverage.
"I always find this published study unbelievable as it derives the clear question who are those chicks dating if 60% males are single? Are the chicks more apt to be lesbians? Are they all dating the same small population of dudes? Are they claiming they are not single just having hooking up now and then, but the boys are defining single as not having a steady relationship?"
I think the term "dating" gets used very loosely there (is a "friend with benefits really dating? Like, if we get some dinner, have sex and I call you again in a week or two when I'm horny, is that dating? I think a lot of women would say "yes.") and yes, they are dating the same population of dudes. Dating apps have made that very easy.
Damn. Wow, that really sucks. No wonder so many guys say to heck with dating. How do you not feel like sex is just a cheap pleasure for modern women if most guys don't even have a chance to make the grade for a relationship? It was bad enough when I was in school with all the girls wanting to date the jocks; now it seems you find yourself getting unfavorably compared to the whole country.
Another well reasoned, researched, and thought provoking article. I foolishly surrendered that youthful portion of my life when I failed to understand why getting married young and having kids would be a benefit to myself and American tradition. I did ultimately marry a fine woman and we have a good marriage, but we started it all after our child bearing years had already passed. Parenthetically, it wasn't for lack of testosterone or interest, I just didn't prioritize marriage. As opposed to the young guys I talk to now, who tell me that even dating a girl is a luxury that's not worth the time or effort (?!). Leaves me with my jaw hanging open to hear that, but all the things you mentioned are the things that they talk about. Foolish things like; "I'm not tall enough. Girls don't find me masculine or "studly." I don't have time right now, I'm focused on my career." It's been tough for a while with our culture; the internet has made it much harder.
When I first started my career as a high school biology teacher, I was talking with my mom about how the teacher education program I went through for my credential did not teach me much about dealing with teenagers. I felt out of place in the classroom. Mom told me to view each student as if I were their father. Treat them the same way I would treat my son and I would hope my son's teachers would treat him.
That was doable. It took several years to put into practice but I consistently improved over the years and as my son grew up. My parents divorced back in 1968. My father was beating her and us kids and she said no more. I grew up without a male role model and never felt I fit in with my male peers. A very wise person told me soon after my son was born that I had plenty of role models for knowing what not to do so I only had to be the dad I wanted when growing up. I would make mistakes but as long as I learned from them and improved, all would be good. He turned out to be right.
Over the past several years I have had some troubled students make great strides in improving because I take the time to talk to them like a father should when addressing their poor behavior and my knowledge that they can do much better and I expect that from them.
Last week, on the last day of school, I was told by more students than ever that they were glad I was their teacher because I helped them, was patient, and encouraged them to always do better and learn from their mistakes. Some even tell me that they wish I could be their dad because they do not have a dad in their lives.
The sad part is, each year the number of students that tell me how much I helped them increases because even more than ever before do not have a dad in their life.
Things are getting worse for all the reasons you mentioned.
The whole "me, too" thing scared the crap out of me. Just an accusation of sexual talk is enough to get a guy fired. Find out what happens when a bi-polar female coworker gets mad at you for any reason, then imagine if she was a student? People even went after Fred Rogers! You're a brave man, doing a good thing in a world that loves to believe the worst.
For a while there, you described my childhood in a 2-parent, Christian household (my papa was a Methodist minister who could preach hell-fire when he deemed it a necessity in the community), a young marriage, 3 precious sons, and a divorce--papa said I had been unevenly yoked--that led to single parenting and dipping a toe in the 1960s dating pool. Now I watch my remaining precious son and his wife, and their two daughters and son in their 20s and 30s, as they navigate today's society. And all I can do is express the love I have for them, guide them from my matriarchal seat if they ask, and treasure them for the people they are, men and women coping in this largely divided world they've inherited. And, of course, this issue of Culturcidal will be shared to the social sites where I have an account, hoping to get your analysis out there. Thank you, John, for putting it together.
I was born in America, had two parents who never got divorced and two grandparents I visited often. It feels like that puts me ahead of 95% of the planet these days.
Well done.
Jordan Peterson and Joe Rogan are influencers helping on this front. I read that more young men are attending church... benefitting from the lessons of scripture but also benefitting from the congregation connections.
"The study found that among men under 30 years old, over 60 percent are single, almost double that of women in the same age bracket."
I always find this published study unbelievable as it derives the clear question who are those chicks dating if 60% males are single? Are the chicks more apt to be lesbians? Are they all dating the same small population of dudes? Are they claiming they are not single just having hooking up now and then, but the boys are defining single as not having a steady relationship?
Males are somewhat responsible for their own defeat here. They enable female vulnerable narcissism and female aggression against them because of their uncontrolled male libido. Males are terrified of females for the simple reason that males fear being denied sex. It is an irrational behavior that likely derives from evolutionary biology. And aside from this, and possibly related to this, is standard male chivalry toward women... even the women that don't deserve it.
I use the following to demonstrate the male flaw.
If females and males are truly equal as is demanded by the feminist left that controls the Democrat party, then if being called a racist, misogynist, Nazi... pushed and spit upon at a protest... why would you not punch that female in the face?
The thought makes you recoil in disgust, doesn't it?
That recoil is evidence of the male flaw and the female leverage.
"I always find this published study unbelievable as it derives the clear question who are those chicks dating if 60% males are single? Are the chicks more apt to be lesbians? Are they all dating the same small population of dudes? Are they claiming they are not single just having hooking up now and then, but the boys are defining single as not having a steady relationship?"
I think the term "dating" gets used very loosely there (is a "friend with benefits really dating? Like, if we get some dinner, have sex and I call you again in a week or two when I'm horny, is that dating? I think a lot of women would say "yes.") and yes, they are dating the same population of dudes. Dating apps have made that very easy.
Damn. Wow, that really sucks. No wonder so many guys say to heck with dating. How do you not feel like sex is just a cheap pleasure for modern women if most guys don't even have a chance to make the grade for a relationship? It was bad enough when I was in school with all the girls wanting to date the jocks; now it seems you find yourself getting unfavorably compared to the whole country.
Another well reasoned, researched, and thought provoking article. I foolishly surrendered that youthful portion of my life when I failed to understand why getting married young and having kids would be a benefit to myself and American tradition. I did ultimately marry a fine woman and we have a good marriage, but we started it all after our child bearing years had already passed. Parenthetically, it wasn't for lack of testosterone or interest, I just didn't prioritize marriage. As opposed to the young guys I talk to now, who tell me that even dating a girl is a luxury that's not worth the time or effort (?!). Leaves me with my jaw hanging open to hear that, but all the things you mentioned are the things that they talk about. Foolish things like; "I'm not tall enough. Girls don't find me masculine or "studly." I don't have time right now, I'm focused on my career." It's been tough for a while with our culture; the internet has made it much harder.